


Two Simple Factors

by Rainbow_boii



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, M/M, Pining Michael, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-31 02:40:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19416790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainbow_boii/pseuds/Rainbow_boii
Summary: Michael probably wouldn't have been as affected by Jeremy abandoning him if it weren't for two simple factors. One, Michael had no one else in the school. They had been friends for years, and never really needed to add anyone else to their group, and neither where they cool enough to if they wanted to. Number two, however, was slightly more complicated. Michael was helplessly in love with Jeremy Heere.





	Two Simple Factors

If Michael knew one thing, it was that, no matter what, he'd be there for Jeremy. They had stuck together through everything, and some stupid tic-tac computer was not going to ruin a twelve-year friendship.

Sure, Jeremy had messed up; But he was only human, after all, and the SQUIP was seriously messing with his head. And honestly, that was part of the reason he was so upset. That Jeremy seriously trusted Rich, the very same guy who had bullied them both in previous years, about a supercomputer that you couldn't even do background research on. There was no way of telling how the computer would mess up Jeremy, and their friendship.

Now, Michael probably wouldn't have been as affected by Jeremy abandoning him if it weren't for two simple factors. One, Michael had no one else in the school. They had been friends for years, and never really needed to add anyone else to their group, and neither where they cool enough to if they wanted to. Number two, however, was slightly more complicated. Michael was helplessly in love with Jeremy Heere.

At first, he didn't recognise it. Not having any other friends to compare the feelings to, he just carried on, thinking his feelings for his best friend were purely platonic, straight, emotions. But he slowly started realising what it was. The first time was when they were playing Apocalypse of the Damned in Michael's basement, just sitting on their own bean bags, when he caught himself staring at Jeremy. It wasn't like Michael thought he was straight, Michael had known since about a year ago that he was gay, or at least attracted to guys, through a long, embarrassing story that he did not like to think back on.

Anyways, they were playing Apocalypse of the Damned, and Michael made the mistake of looking towards Jeremy. And really, Michael had to admit, Jeremy was kinda cute, eyebrows furrowed in concentration, tongue poking out slightly. Michael tried to focus on the game instead of his best friend, but honestly was failing, quite miserably. Unfortunately, Jeremy decided to take that moment to glance towards Michael, and, upon seeing Michael's considerably flushed face, grew concerned for his friend.

"You okay, Mikey? You looked a bit zoned out," Jeremy put his hand to the top of Michael's forehead. "At least you don't have a temperature, do you need a bit of a break?"   
"No, no, Miah, I'm fine. Besides, we need to get past this level." Michael grinned at Jeremy. They went back to playing, and Michael didn't think of it again.

Then, one day, in freshman year, it hit him. It was another average day. The boys were just hanging around in Jeremy's room, talking, when Michael decided to take his hoodie off. He threw it onto the bed and sighed. Jeremy, sweet, innocent Jeremy, had the idea to wear the hoodie. So while Michael was busy talking about some new video game he wanted to try, when he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked over, and then, he saw just about the most adorable sight in the known universe. There, sitting next to him, was Jeremy Heere, in Michael's hoodie, which was oversized on Jeremy, who was quite skinny compared to others, especially for his height. The sleeves kinda fell past his hands. Michael sat there, dazed and blushing. That was the day he realised. He was in love with Jeremy Heere.

Now, Michael sat on his bed, tears forming in his eyes. Whatever happened, he didn't want to lose Jeremy. His best friend since pretty much forever. He knew what he had to do.

"Get out of my way." Jeremy shoved past Michael harshly.

"Loser."

He regretted ever coming to the party. He came here to help, and to save Jeremy. And what happened? He was called a loser. By Jeremy. His best friend, who not too long ago had called Michael his favourite person. And now, here Michael was, alone in the bathroom at Jake's party, feeling hopeless, and lost. Whenever Michael was upset or anxious, or having a panic attack, he would always have Jeremy. He never thought he would be here alone because of Jeremy. And he absolutely hated it. He could feel the tears forming in his eyes.

He just didn't care anymore. He wanted to just stay here, drowning in the tears, but he knew he had to leave eventually. He felt like if he disappeared, no one would notice. Jeremy certainly wouldn't. And at that moment, that was all he could think about. Loser. If it were anyone else, he wouldn't care. But Jeremy, his best friend of twelve years, and his crush of three of those. Tears streamed down his face as he gasped for breath. Jeremy left him alone to have a panic attack in the bathroom. Life couldn't seem to get any worse. He splashed water on his face and made sure he didn't look like he'd been crying in the bathroom. He left the party without looking back.

  
The next day, on the news about a fire that happened at the very house of the Halloween party. Despite himself, all he could think about was Jeremy. Did he get out in time? Is he okay? He can't be dead. It would be sad, ironic, even, if Jeremy's last words he said to him were calling him a loser.

He saw Jeremy at school the next day. While relieved, he did not bother to talk to him. He almost burst into tears, just by looking at him. The words repeated themselves over and over in his head. It hurt. So, so much. His Jeremy had called him a loser. But what hurt most, was it was all Jeremy. There was no blaming the SQUIP this time. He said alcohol messed the stupid tic tac up. Which meant that's what Jeremy thought about him. Had he always thought this, but just not said it cause he had no one else? Or was it something recent, that Jeremy had only recently discovered? Would Jeremy ever take him back? Michael was completely and utterly lost. Without his player two, it was hard to focus, hard to be happy. Not even video games helped anymore. They just reminded Michael of Jeremy. Of Halloween. Of Jeremy refusing Michael's help, and calling him a loser. He was a hundred per cent and absolutely done with everything. He grabbed a lighter, and a box full of memories from his and Jeremy's twelve years of being friends.  
Its contents would burn, just like their friendship.


End file.
